Chapter 11 : New Days
It’s been a month since I witnessed Aiden and Troy cheating on me and Nina. I have been so deeply scorn I don’t know if I could ever love again. I decided to just turn inward for a while. At some point I don’t even know what I’m fighting for.
I just started back at work; I used my vacation days, and medical leave for excuses. After some encouragement from Blake, JJ, and Roy I knew I could not sulk forever. JJ stayed with me for a while, Blake had to return to Chicago to Devon and for work, but said if I or Nina needed him he would be on the very next plane back to Atlanta. He even thought I should come back to Chicago for a while to get my head together, but I turned down the offered. I enjoyed my place and the city of Atlanta and was not ready to give it up just yet.
I checked up on Nina and she recovered a little slower than I did. I could imagine so, I just hoped she didn’t take this out on all gay black men. We are not all trying to get every straight guy who lives and breathes. In her tone I could sense hostility. She said she wasn’t satisfied and it was not over.
So when I got a phone call from Roy telling me to turn on the news to see Troy Clinton had died in his vehicle we immediately tried finding Nina. She claims she was at work, and she had not heard the news. His vehicle had turned over on I-285 onto incoming traffic. He was the only casualty. Vouching for Nina was the alcohol in troy’s system. He left a note saying that he could not deal with his D.L. life and now had no one to talk to, and feared being put on blast at his CNN office.
Nina took the news with a sarcastic tone and simply hung up
Within my time off, I started to reflect on how in college I used to be so strong and independent. How does a man fuck that up? When I did become so depend on companionship?
I knew a brighter tomorrow was coming and I was more than ready for it.
I called my cousin to thank him for his support during the trial, and he was telling me some things that happen to him when he was in college, and how his life was working out now. Some guy named Basil was on the D.L. as well and he could not understand how they can think some things were acceptable. The paths he and I were taking were leading to the life and world we ultimately wanted to live in.
“Well Raymond I guess it’s like you said, the Invisible Life is no life at all.”
THE END
(In Memory of E. Lynn Harris)
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