K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Epilogue

Epilogue

I have found that life has ups and downs, trials and tribulations, but when things get tough the only thing to do is keep living. There is no perfect life nor is there a perfect person, but there are roads that we take, that help us all gain a better understanding of self, thus enable us to get a better perception on others and surroundings.

Nina moved to Atlanta and started her job a few weeks ago. She has had a new range of people and take things in stride, in true Nina form. However, she has found a new interest at work, and has been having conversations with a certain co-employee that she wants the rest of us to meet.

Blake has been more productive at work. He surprised all of us by announcing his completion of his eighth month in a monogamous relationship, thus breaking another curse.

Roy has decided to have house parties once a month to explore new people and open up his scope for potential men. He has started taking things a little less seriously, and has grown to more moderate positions in his mind.

Jackson (JJ) has continued to converse with Nathan, and they are doing great. Jackson was inspired by Nathan to get tested and have a more serious prospective on life, and not to take things for granted. He and Nathan are taking a cruise together. The distance has not stopped their communication, in fact, it has strengthen there relationship, giving it more substance.

I, Kennedy Tyler, have learned I look at things with too much of a desperate approach, wanting things to work and panic if life happens between. I have learned to appreciate small things and stay positive if things fall apart. What happen to Aiden? Nothing happen, he is still in the picture, in fact we have two or three in my place. We still decided to keep separate places on paper, but he has basically moved in my place. He gives me respect and love, on a spiritual, physical, and mental level and I could not ask for more.

My mind tells me he has it together and my heart desires to be with him. For once they are on one accord. This is a reality I am glad has a blurring line with my dreams.

THE END

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 16

Chapter 16: Fairy Tale or Reality

Roy opened up, Nina explored new realms, Blake grew up, and JJ installed morale, I would say the party gave a lot more than physical gifts.

I saw the guest leave one by one, and made sure Nina and Roy were satisfied as they walked out the door. Blake was in his room sleep and I was almost done cleaning my house.

“Everyone cut out already?”

I turned around to see Aiden standing in the overpass in my hallway.

“Well, it’s getting late sir,” I laughed, as I continue to clean.

“Why don’t you relax from that, and just rest. This is not a business event, it’s a party for your friends, you’re supposed to relax.”

I could not believe how he caught that, either I was really transparent or he was just observant—or stalking me—I chose observant.

“What makes you think I’m treating this professionally? This is my house, I just want to make sure things are organized, inventory is checked, you know, half these peoples (including you) I really did not know.” I joked.

“Well Kennedy, you doing things here just like you did at the proposal event your computer firm did for our industrial meeting.”

I stepped back. I then realized I had seen Aiden before, at the meeting, he was just under the CEO. He was running the company effectively, knowing technical inputs and was very sharp on questioning our quarterly reviews and looked for the best possible turnover time. The fact that he talked to Blake on that site I hated, just showed me how small the world truly was.

“Well Mr. Smith you caught me,” I chuckled.

“We talked a long while that day during that event, and even had a business
dinner to close the deal. I’m hurt you did not remember me.”

“Well Aiden, you have to understand, on my job I am strictly professional, I never try any advance on business partners or the market. I am very focused in that respect.”

“I can understand that and even respect that in you. That is why when I found out through Blake this party was happening and you were throwing it I had to come. I wanted another chance to talk to you, outside our suits.

“I’m honored.” I smiled, as I finished putting up the last of the garbage and dishes from the party.

The shadows of our bodies were the only thing left in my living room, and my iPod had just started filling the room with Maxwell’s Whenever Wherever Whatever.

“Would you like to dance Mr. Tyler?” Aiden said as he approached me.
He took my hand before I could speak, and we started to slow dance. His hands caressed the middle of my back, shaping my body to his. His fingers traced the palm of my hand, as he stared into my eyes. His hazel eyes pierced my knees making me float only by his strength. Maxwell hit a high note and I placed my head on his well defined shoulder and engulfed his scent. He brushed his lips against my neck I moved my head back and looked at him. He stopped moving, then gently placed his hand on the back of my head and gravitated my lips to his, and for a moment we jumped in the chords of the song, and I felt nothing more than melody dance from his tongue to mine. He pulled my shirt off and traced my abs with his tongue then lifted me up, keeping his hands palmed under my booty and carried me to my room. His body rippled against mine, pulsating sweat, heat, and rhythm. I could feel his vibrations from inside to out, and I did not want it to stop. He gripped my body like I have only dreamed, and felt every nerve within my body quiver to his touch. The only light I saw was from the reflection in his eyes and the rising sun.

Hours had passed by and he held me like he did not want to go. We talked about what was to happen next. He made it clear that he had no intentions of letting me go, and even though he had me, he REALLY wanted to have me. He wanted to take things step by step and wanted a full relationship.

“Relationship?” I asked “Are you sure that is what you want? I have high expectations.”

“Well Mr. Tyler, I have no worries about your expectations, just hope you have endurance to last a lifetime with me.”

I could not fight it. He was a confident, strong, comfortable man that wanted me for me. I pulled his arms tighter around me just in case I awoke from this dream.

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 15

Chapter 15: Substance

Blake, Nina, and Roy have seemed to transition into the crowd comfortably, chatting with guest, laughing, and dancing to the low-played Tevin Campbell setting the mood in the air. Kennedy has even relaxed a little. I guess I never realized the stress of having these people in his place would be, but everyone is enjoying the atmosphere and things are peaceful so it worked out.

Deciding that things were not going to be any better and it would be perfect to leave; I raise up to grab my things and leave when I feel my arm being brushed from behind. I turn to find a tall, chestnut tone brotha with stature of a Greek sculpture and a low fade asking for my name.

“Jackson, but everyone calls me JJ. And yours would be?” I quizzed.

“My name is Nathan. Are you from here?”

“I’m from Kentucky, but I live and work in Jackson, Mississippi, “ I started. “How did you catch wind of our little mixer for Roy?”

“Blake invited me through Black4Boys.com. I usually never use it, but I do have a few business associates that use it for leisurely conversation.”

I laughed at the thought of business men leisurely conversation on the site during business meetings and held back comments.

“Were you leaving? I would love to talk to you if you don’t mind.”

“No I have no plans after the party, just wanted the night to end right.”

“Well how about you stay and talk to me, and we can see how it ends.”

Nathan engaged me in conversation for two straight hours. I didn’t even notice the slow leak of people starting to leave, mostly of which were people I invited headed to their hotels. I could not believe under the surface of that glossy physique he had a mind that made me feel the pulse through my fingertips.

“So Nathan, what is wrong with you.” I asked. “You have great things going for yourself. You have a great career in medicine and you are mobile, without kids and a wife, not on the D.L., and have a house. Why haven’t you found a companion?”

“That’s just it. Everyone is not looking for a companion. They’re looking for hook-up buddies. I’m trying to find someone for me, that’ll be there when I need them and want to be around just for my company.” he said. Then he started to hesitate.

“What’s the matter?” I could sense his resistance.

“People usually are attractive to me, because of the way I look,” he began, “They just want sex. That’s how I used to be, but not anymore. JJ I’m HIV positive.”

I could not believe it. He looked so healthy. I mean he looked like someone I would take in a back room and have all types of ways with. Then I started to think on his words. Did I fall in the category of people who were looking for quick body-fix? Did I want more?

We talked for another hour about life and goals. All the while we talked I could not help but appreciate his honesty, it made me attracted to him even more. He had dreams and plans for the future and had a very nurturing spirit.

He then stood up and I followed suite and we said our good-byes to the guest. I reassured Nina, Roy, Blake, and Kennedy I was not going to do anything, and would call once I got to my room since Nathan offered to take me to the hotel.

I would say I learned this night how to look past the surface to see the substance. Now the night ended right!

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Maturity

Nina announced to Kennedy, JJ, and I that she was moving to Atlanta. After we picked our faces up from the floor, we celebrated another year of Roy’s life and Nina’s moving. It seem like a time of change for them both.

I stood at the top of Kennedy’s living room, observing the scene, and scoping on what Atlanta had to offer. Then it happened, my two worlds had combined. My ex from the south side of Chicago had somehow found his way here! He was a coca brown brotha of average height with long hair that gave him a image like the R&B singer, Lloyd. He had a little darker tint than I normally go for, but his booty, lips, and hair did me in.

“What are you doing here?” I asked Brian, as I pulled him to side.

“Don’t act brand new, I was invited by one of my Atlanta friends, I came into town for a business trip and stayed an extra day for his invite. He said his friend from Chicago was going to be here, and was told about the party through Blakcs4Guys.com. I had no idea it was you, but no matter, not going to let that stop my fun. There are some fine brothas in here, especially the one whose house this is. Do you know if his taken?”

Listening to Brian boiled away at my very core. His snappy tone and raw intentions disturbed me beyond reason, and his advance to my friend, Kennedy sent me over the top. My protective nature took over my playboy mentality, and I was floored. What bothered me most was the fact that his intentions and pursuit sounded a lot like me. I could not handle the morbid fact that he had not grown from the time we were together, two years ago, till now. That simple fact forced me to realize that I needed I new attitude. There was no way in the world I would ever give Brian another chance, because of his “free-spirit” attitude, but then what does that say about me? What person that I have been with say those exact same words but in reference to me?

“Kennedy is too good of a person for simple hoes. Hope you enjoyed the party I’ll walk you to the door.”

I closed and bolted the door after I insured Brian and his two men crew exited my friend’s premises.

“Everything okay?” Kennedy says over my shoulder after I close the door.

“Yes, just fine.” I smiled “I think it’s time I man up, Kennedy. I’m taking the first flight back tomorrow to Chicago. I need to get my priorities together, and hopefully recover my job if I still have one.”

He hugged me, “Great to hear from you Blake. What brought on this epiphany?”

“Just something in the air. Now let’s enjoy the rest of the party. It seems Roy is mixing with the crowd, after his and Nina’s little talk. Seems like we can tell the Atlanta Police Department to fall back, we won’t need them as quickly as we thought.” I laughed as rejoined my friends in the new refreshing essence I carried.

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Reckoning

I open the door to Kennedy’s residence to see a group of faces I do not recognize. From the crowd I hear, “Surprise!” and I see Kennedy, Nina, Blake, and JJ come from the back of the group with a cake full of candles.

“Welcome to your party.” Blake says. I examine the room, comforted with the familiar faces of friends and close bonds, yet shaken by the background of onlookers that seem to have inhabited the same space.

“Who are all these people?” I ask Kennedy.

“Friends of Blake and JJ,” he says, forcibly smiling and gesturing the background to invade the comfort of the foreground of familiarity.

“This is all great…please excuse me…work clothes,” I lied to escape the crowd, and drift to the back room of Kennedy’s house I usually stayed in whenever he and I would go out and I would crash here. I found some casual, comfortable clothes I left in a drawer and breathed in the last twenty minutes.

I heard the door close; I jump up to see Nina.

“I had no hand in the group of unknowns.”
Shaking from laughter, Nina and I reflect on our discord for new faces and unfamiliarity.

“I have a surprise I wanted to reveal to you first, before I told Kennedy and the others,” she whispers. “I’m moving to Atlanta.”

The shock hit me like a new fine black man at a northern state school. Nina trying something different, especially on the scale of living and location was a total surprise.

“What inspired this?” I asked, examining her from head to toe.

“I have been privately working from Jackson via networking with this company here. They offered me a better package deal, a house, a company car, and a increase in pay if I relocated. I never had much incentive to leave before, even when I accepted the job, I made my position quite clear I was not going to move. However, I just never had any incentive to leave. Now, I do, and I know you and Kennedy stay here, and I have been here a couple of times and the city has grown on me.”

We exchanged a hug that felt more of a shattering of a curse. Nina was evolving in front of my eyes. She was beginning to break her guard of unfamiliarity and her being in a crowd that was new to her was an additional testimony to her growth. I was forced to glance at her another time and then reflect on my reaction to the crowd, waiting for me outside the safety of the room.

It was time for a change of my traditional self, it was time for growth. I took Nina’s hand and we headed back into the party.

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 12

Chapter 12: Showtime

It’s an hour before Roy is suppose to arrive, and Nina helps me setup decorations while murmuring sarcastic stabs at JJ and Blake—who are setting up the food and music—every five minutes. Blake’s associate, Aiden, moves my couches to the wall opening the floor area.

Aiden has soft caramel complexion that has been gently kissed by the sun and cooled giving him a natural glow. His full lips only frame a straight, white smile and when he smiled, the sweetness ripples from his dimples. He has great broad shoulders that hang his defined chest that beams from under his shirt.

“Kennedy! What are we going to do?” Nina snaps.
I explain to her my plan, and after scrutinizing looks, she grudgingly agreed. I sat on a stool with my head in my hands waiting for the execution to countdown.

“You seem stressed, is there anything you want to vent out?” I look up to see Aiden luring over me, his cologne brought my blood to the surface, tingle my sensations, and breathed goose bumps to my body.

“I’m just nervous on my friend’s party; he is not big on these types of events.” I had forgotten my rage, forgotten the party, hell I forgot my name.

“Well, I am glad you allowed Blake to invite me here. He told me about you and I was really looking forward to meeting you, but—if you don’t mind me saying—had no idea how attractive you were.

I drifted into a world of total clouds, instrumental, slow music played in my head, and I started to float, then I heard in the distance I heard a door close and saw Roy looking around the room…the floating had turned to a crash, I suddenly could feel all my senses intensify, and time stopped.

K.Tyler Series Vol 1 - Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Crunch

I hung up the phone with Nina, and I sit down to collect my thoughts. I just got back from the airport from picking up Blake, and was just looking forward to rejoicing and relaxing, not refereeing. Blake came out the back room of my Atlanta home asking who I was cussing at like that. I couldn’t hold back my furry.

I hopped over my couch and jump on Blake and start shaking him like the found father of a long child support investigation.

“Where the HELL do you get off inviting some strange niggas to my shit!”

I released him so he could answer, and he turned and looked at me and smiled.

“Kennedy I wanted that to be a surprise, you know, just adding a mix of people to the party giving it a little flavor.”

“I got your flavor, you ass.” I breathed deep. “Ok, I’m not going to panic, the party is tonight, Roy is coming here after he gets off work. Nina and JJ are only an hour outside of town. JJ’s people have been following him so I guess they’re near as well. He said they’re staying a t nearby hotel after the party, so where are your people?”

“Don’t worry Kennedy. It’s only like five people, and Aiden even say he’ll come early and help with setting up and stay to clean up.”

“Who the hell is Aiden?”

“He is from our home town, but moved down here.”

There was no way I could change things now, without rescheduling things with Roy and that would make him suspicious. It was bad enough throwing a surprise party for him and not be murdered in some tragic way, but this was a sure signature on all of our death certificates. Well the best thing to do now is to not cause a scene at my house, LORD knows how I would hate to be the parody of all gay black men and have the guys fighting at my house. So the only reasonable quick solution I could think of was to act like this was all part of the plan, at least present that image to Roy so he wouldn’t begin the manslaughter of hundreds.

Friends : How Many Of Us REALLY Have Them

So I have conscientiously decided that I wasn't going to be one of the bloggers that post like everyday, but when I do I feel it's a real issue. So today's bowl of rice deals with friendship.

I have a scenario for you all: You have a BEST friend-emphasis on BEST--and you find out some drastic information about them. Now you would normally throw this off as rumor and gossip, because as your best friend, any serious issue that would come up, good,bad, or indifferent, you feel that you two have the understanding that you could discuss it [whatever it was] as adults. You write off the fact that in hindsight some of the things being done make the hearsay seem creditable, and it startles you to feel like that,but the source of the actions and hearsay are two completely different outlets, yet somehow point in the same direction.



Here's the kicker, you're BEST friend then stumbles and tells you what the issue is, after indirect [or direct] mentioning of the problem, or issue, making the hearsay creditable. You're astonished! No matter what the drastic topic was, the fact you heard it hearsay and had to come to them about it, rather than you two discuss it blows you. You felt at least, you would've been the first, if not in the first of few to know. The real twist hear is that, they have danced around the topic when brought up, and not giving you any real answer, till now. There reasoning and rationale is they haven't done anything wrong, just haven't told you the whole truth. [To me the same as lying]




So here's my question: How do you prevent yourself from locking the hell up, and closing out any and everyone. In your mind you feel that if the people closest to you are not who/what you think they are. You have out yourself out there, truthfully and exposed, receiving their criticism because you believe this person is closet to you and will give you advice with their hearts and mind on you having the best. How do you not shut out the world.

ADVICE PLEASE!!!

Movie Monday

Movie Monday : Ultraviolet

This Monday, I am promoting Ultraviolet. It's a great action movie. Watch and enjoy for bad ass fight scenes from a kick-ass chick. It puts you in the mindset of Matrix, but with more of a futuristic flavor. The star of the movie also starred in the Resident Evil trilogies. Thumbs up for fight scenes and classic one-liners. The plot is more of a hit-and-miss, but it's worth watching at least once.

Movie Mondays!!!

Movie Mondays!!!

I'm going to start advertising a new movie every Monday that i think is worth watching at least once.

K.Tyler Series Vol.1 - Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Breaking Points

Riding in the car with JJ is no picnic, but finding out the doom in which he and Blake setup for Roy’s party will be a hell that is limitless in pain and intensity. What the hell was I thinking of coming on this trip. It’s all for Roy, he better be damn happy I agreed to come, surprise or not. At the core I am against these frivolous types of episodes, but Kennedy really wanted to make this work, and he and Roy have been there for me. So I swallowed some of my better judgment and dug deep…DEEP…for a rational mind to allow me to take this journey.

Had I known then, what I know now, I would have climbed to top of the nearest building and hurled my lifeless self over the side. Not only is the idea, of JJ’s friends being at an event—I initially thought was just for the five of us—enough to make me want to take over the car and run into the oncoming sign, but Blake’s internet crew being there as well sent me over the top. I was going to a new city, and the only comfort I had placed in my mind (surrounded with familiar faces, and sanctuary of mind) was now stolen from me by two of my friends that were competing childishly for dumb ass queens that no one will probably like.

I called Kennedy to vent, and to my surprise he knew nothing about it! Kennedy seemed more pissed than I was and that is saying something. JJ continuing driving and telling us not to worry things were going to work out fine. I put the phone on speakerphone, and Kennedy started cussing out JJ calling him inconsiderate and questioning him on who were these “friends”, whose paying for extra food for them, and where are they staying? He and JJ went back and forth, and I just started to breathe deeply not verbally responding at all. Kennedy then told me to take him off speakerphone. He sounded as though he was forcing a calm tone, telling me not to kill JJ in the car, and just wanted us to get to Atlanta safely, and he will figure things out once we arrive. All I know Is Kennedy was right about one thing, this was going to be a birthday Roy would not forget.

K.Tyler Series Vol.1 - Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Deeper Holes

Blake and I were just talking about Roy’s party and how exciting it’s going to be for all five of us to be together. I told him that Nina and I were riding from Jackson together, and how I thought it was going to be interesting and a miracle if Nina does not kill me. Then, he told me he invited some people to Roy’s party, and I became heated.

“How are you going to invite some people for yourself like that, knowing that we all will be lucky to get out alive by Roy for even throwing a surprise party, let alone, have people there he has no clue about.”

He rationalized it out as an opportunity to meet and greet new people with similar interest, backgrounds, and it will be a real cool atmosphere. Blake and I tend to agree at the core of things, however, on the surface I was still upset he volunteered people I didn’t know to this get together.

I took the liberty to make some moves myself. I had some associates that I am sociable with that I extended the invitation out to as well. No sense of having just ATLiens at the party, why not some Mississippians as well. I think it will add a certain “spice” to the broth.

A disclaimer I want to air out to the public is the fact I am not jealous of Blake bringing people, nor I am I a hypocrite for inviting people like he did, I am just setting the atmosphere at the party with people that are actually from Roy’s home state. Roy does not know who these people from Black4Boys.com are and I actually seen these friends in person. It will be fine. That’s my reasoning and I stand by it.

K.Tyler Series Vol. 1- Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Misunderstandings

So I realize this weekend is going to be all about Roy, but that does not mean I can’t have fun while I’m in Atlanta. Kennedy called me saying “Blake It would be great if we were altogether. The gift of friendship will be overwhelming.” How could I say no? I am pretty well known in the gay circles of the Chicago ring. I’m not a hoe, I am just well networked. I know anyone who needs to be known either by a face reference or name. A lot of people of I have met on Black4Boys.com and have met an array of people. Through my little web of connections I have told a few of my associates I will be in their town, once I get into Atlanta, and they should join my friends and I at the surprise party. I think of mix of hot guys and my friends will be a great atmosphere for fun and excitement.

In my excitement I forgot to properly take off of work and get approved, but they should be fine without me. It’s just a job and this is an opportunity for me to find a fine buttermilk brotha with bubble booty and tight, long braids to endure my passion, and I can’t pass it up. It’s going to be a new town, new faces, and new bodies.

K.Tyler Series Vol 1. - Chapter 7

Chapter 7: The Plan

Coat in hand, plans and invitations in bag, I head to the door. Reaching back for the forgotten umbrella, I come to grips on realizing it was going to be one of the days that I wished the power went out, and I could just stay in, but that was not an option, I had to make sure everything was organized for Roy’s surprise party. I Knew Blake, JJ, and Nina were all coming into town for this big event and I wanted it to be flawless. Problem was, as the “event coordinator” I felt thoroughly flawed, I could not shake the moments of wanting to be held, touched, and brushed by a strong, masculine torso insuring security and touches of passion. But I knew this was not about me, it was about Roy, and that is the mindset I wanted to keep. At least with this, I could have a focus and drive outside of men.

The first call I received from my invitations was from Blake. He said he took off from work, last minute of course in true Blake fashion, and booked a flight to Atlanta for the weekend. He seemed really enthused to be coming to see the city. We both grew up in Chicago, and he now worked in there but, Atlanta gives a little different flavor than the Chi as far as men selection goes, so I knew what his intentions were. I could not help but shake my head at his giddy tone when we talked on the phone; he had told me he had already researched the nightlife scene and saw “light-bright” potential—another way of saying a nice selection of light-skinned brothas.

I touched bases with JJ and Nina on a three-way conference call. After reluctance on Nina’s part, I convinced them both to share the car ride together from Jackson, Mississippi. I already knew Nina’s sarcasm and JJ’s free-lance thought process was going to make for an interesting six hours but at least they would arrive here together in one piece…hopefully.